I go to the doctor today. I hate this appointment. I know whats going to happen. I will go in wanting answers and leave without any. I will be examined and he will say ok go back to regular life, wait two cycles and try again. SUCKS! I have written down a list of questions to ask, all of which don't really have answers, but I'll ask anyway. SUCKS!
Lately I have been feeling robbed. Robbed of my child, robbed of the joy of pregnancy (i can't Imogen getting excited about being pregnant, just terrified.) Robbed of telling people exciting news. Josie's sibling has been taken away.
I am teaching Edgar Allan Poe this month and boy does that fit. I can really connect to his dark poetry. I am also teaching poetry writing and I love it. The kids really pour their hearts into writing and I have cried reading many of them. One girl lost her dad, a boy's parents are going though a divorce. They put their pain into this. I promised I would be the only person to read what they write, but I wish I could share it.
My 7th graders are just awesome and even though only a handful know what happened they are a big part of me wanting to get up in the morning. My husband thinks I'm crazy for being so upset, we have child why is this so hard on me? Maybe I am crazy.
1 week ago
2 comments:
You aren't crazy and have every reason to be upset and feel like you do. Love you!
Danielle, I am so sorry you are going through all of this (and more than once) Quite honestly I dont know what to say because I do not know how you feel, I am sure you have got the corny "God's will" responses and are probably tired of hearing it. I think its ok to be sad and angry for a while. Just know that I am praying for you, especially for God to heal your heart.
:)
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